and I didnt even know his name until this morning when we were laying in bed and he referred to himself in the 3rd person.
I am so getting Plan B when we get home. Not getting knocked up by a dude with a hair piece.
the worst part of it wasnt him peeing on the xbox. it was when he showed me his penis and made a kissy face at me. THAT was painful.
sometimes i wish i had boobs. not on me. just like in a drawer.
you called me in the middle of the night, wandering the streets, in search of "the ultimate burrito"
Great. Woke up in Ts room wearing one sock, a glove and a beret with a sorrority chick CLEARLY out of my league. Jose Cuervo you ARE a friend of mine.
No more fucking baseball tools. Walk-of-shamed home in only a pinstriped jersey and a Red Sox SnapBack.
he said verbatim, he wants to "bang you hard".
Seriously, this trumpet player gives me chills. Might be the drugs.
That's awesome and prob the first time you had an idea of what to do. I'm super proud of you Chelz
Its cos im stoned ! My high self is maturing
I told this guy in the dining hall that he's a hippie god and he's never made eating yogurt so sexy
I was watching porn and wanted to change the tab to another video to cum but I clicked the wrong tab and it was a gif of a dog but I was coming and couldn't do anything so did I jill off to a dog? I feel like I should be guilty
She told me the only rule was that I couldn't cum on her Batman blanket.
I have vodka, fruit gushers, and health insurance. Let's party.
It'd be good to change things up a bit, right now the only public service I'm doing from my apt is hanging out in my underwear with the lights on.
Randomize
