Do u have any bacon or vodka by chance
filled out health questionnaire for lower premiums a little bit too honestly. Literally got assigned a life coach.
You need Jesus. Or a midol and a snickers. Whichever.
we may have ended up at a gay bar on accident. we're gonna work this to get free drinks.
The pine trees are waving at me.
Put the pipe down honey.
Hi trees.
the igloo is complete. bring your weed and the hat with the floppy ears
say it with me now .. the "golden" penis. his nickname does not disappoint.
When did we convert life to cartoon?
Oh it's not a problem. Cleaning up the yard and disposing of 75 gallons of Jello is all I've got to look forward to today.
Who needs sounds of the ocean? I just fall asleep to whatever chubby he is banging next door.
That makes 14 Xmas cards already! Middle aged people are really nice to their dealers.
what better way to celebrate the birth of jesus christ than to get embarrassingly intoxicated and make poor decisions!?
I hate political talk. I just wanna get fucked into an alternate universe where Bernie Sanders is president.
Don't let me pee the bed... Its going to be one of those weekends
Tell her that we understand the angle wasn't the best on the first video and that we forgive her.
Randomize
