alright got my week's quota of sex in, ready for modern warfare 2
do you know how scary it is to wake up in a CATSCAN machine after a night of drinking?
She was adopted and used to dance at Sapphire. just my speed.
I just realized I've stolen a hat from every guy I fucked. Except the last one. Maybe there is hope for me.
my mom sold the house because of the grow room the couple saw i had in the basement.
i go for whatevers easier....i'm bisexual strictly due to the convenience factor
Have invented new cocktail. Any flavor of crystal light and vodka. I call it "I am going to die alone"
Won't anyone wonder why I'm mute, bald, and wearing an eye patch?
Ya I painted "STOP TRYING ANAL" on her headboard. I'm sick of listening to her whine through the wall and bitch the next day.
Looks like breakfast in bed is out the window. She can't get up because I "fucked her into paralysis." My stomach is not happy with my dick right now
I forgot to tell you, the medics put you in a wheel chair. ( I kept telling you to cat daddy) oh you also gave everyone high fives for speaking English.
If you don't want me in your apartment then lock your door better
CUTE BOY IN THE OFFICE WALKED BY AS I WAS STARING IN HORROR AT HARRY POTTER THEMED SKELETON PORN
Omg in one week, two guys with their own names tattooed on their bodies had their tongues in my mouth. Self loathing shall commence now.
I’m a lady. I promise I won’t oogle your junk when we go skinny dipping.
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