I just don't have the heart to tell my mom you peed in our washer machine last night.
we had incredible sex, then he proposed with the vibrating cock ring
lets be honest. she's not NEARLY as much fun to fb creep since she got out of rehab...
Lesbian chick is doing her presentation on the time she woke up on the dockside still drunk at 7 am. This is why I show up to chinese class.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You told him you loved him!?
I mean if he translated "Zi luve ku" as that then yes.
you're the only person I know who would bring a water bottle of screwdriver to a wedding, and toast with it during the speech
You're the only person that can successfully use titties and Jesus in the same sentence.
Step one go to argentina step two fuck bitches it's a simple plan really
I just called the on campus pharmacy and asked the pharmacist to tell me how each one of my medications will react with "excess alcohol consumption". And I'm not even ashamed...I've reached a new low.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I was expecting it to be of the "I am your vagina's reckoning" caliber.
He put those pics of him with those girls on facebook and tagged his wife in them
Tequila 1 marriage 0
So now I can cross "have my ass be someone's phone background" off the bucket list. You know, if it was something I actually had wanted to happen.
The convent might be a nice break from real life
Im gonna start dry humping the manequins and see if i get fired.
i feel like the girl with kaleidoscope eyes except the kaleidoscopes are sparkly butt plugs
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