I want the hot one, scratch that. anyone.
booty call
i swear to god if you come over i will kick you in the pussy.
Sweet. Might not hurt to poop on the floor anyway.
the toilet has never flushed louder then when you sneak home drunk and try to avoid your parents hearing you puke.
I know it sounds like a good idea, but doing Spanish homework at a bar just because the owners are Mexican and they give us margaritas really wasn't the best decision.
I mean, I'm all about sharing, but when he tells me about his wet dreams about Oprah, I think it's taking it too far.
You probably don't remember. You were drunk and getting your tits drummed on like haitian bongos in a voodoo ritual.
just used my nephews bottle to take my birth control
You were jumping on the trampoline and screaming that you couldn't feel the fire.
I threw up in the bar parking lot and yelled THIS IS MY FUTURE.
I think that's mostly how we became friends.
Well that, and your desire to put your penis in me.
its like i had a thought but i dont know what the words are for it
there was 'chicken suit porn' in my search history.......also 'scuba diving porn'
He pushed a skinny white blonde out of the way just to tell me "you have the finest ass, like ever."
I have never loved a nerdy white boy this much.
Good. Go forth, young stallion. Destroy the vaginal region with your tidy crotch.
Randomize
