he whispered in my ear that he would be upstairs and i should come up. i stayed downstairs. he came back down and repeated to whisper in my ear. this happened about 5 times until he passed out.
We just picked up about 540 lbs of women....
you were running down the aisles of wal mart singing 'follow the yellowbrick road'. i'm pretty sure you thought the night shift workers were the munchkins & started crying when they wouldnt help u find the wizard. needless to say u were pretty stoned/wasted
Just try to make good decisions...remember our convo we had about morals the other day?
Turn them off?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just heard "Kiss Me Though the Phone" for the first time. Amazed how it took Soulja Boy two songs to become a shitter version of Ja Rule.
you have to choose: penises or morals?
Turning 21 on Saint Patty's day. I like to think this is what my alcoholic ancestors have prepared me for
You tried to poop in the sink last night.
Yea it's a sex scar. But if anyone asks I tripped up carpeted stairs
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just a heads up, i'm sleeping in te back seat of your car so don't be freaked out when you see me in the A.M.
She just called at a dance party, and you stopped mid puke to join. Another successful night.
Hey. It's Michael. The guy that had his tongue in your mouth last night. Just wanted to check in with you.
I thought you were dead but then you asked me if your tits looked good. They did.
Welp, no use in crying over spilt milk. I can't unbang her.
I was pretty sure he wouldn't be into me after I fucked his brother, and then his best friend, and yet, here I am doing lines off his stomach
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