You know what, matt, a girl is not really that interested in a relationship if she goes down on you the first time she meets you
Sign #1 this conference will suck: Ice breaker question, how many proud virgins do we have in the room, overwhelming response. Looks like I'm not getting laid this weekend.
Henry's handball, Tiger Wood's Car Crash, Roger Federer losing ... That's it....I'm throwing my Gillete away
we were doing it doggy-style and i felt him pop that pimple on my back.I have mixed feelings about it
Do 'mystery' cracked ribs heal any quicker than regular ones?
Turns out I wasn't throwing up blood, I just threw up so hard it ripped my tonsils. Thank you Jameson.
That penis you're staring at is the penis of heartbreak. Stay away. It will break your heart AND keep you away from other penises. BACK. OFF. THE PENIS.
So is there a reason your dad is passed out naked in my shower? P.S. Congrats on the family dong.
I didn't get it..
I'm sorry. But to the original question please.
Well if she's the kinda girl that doesn't want you after seeing a pic of your balls squeezed together, she's not the girl for you.
Sorry for pissing on y'all's floor last night
You know darned well I have a well-documented weakness for redheads, Subway and hand-drawn graphic novels.
HE LEFT ME THE DAY AFTER I LET HIM PEE ON ME. If you date him after that, I'll leave the fucking PLANET.
she's always on high-alert for lesbians
You don’t need a wing man if you have a solid hook up on the pumpkin pie
all I remember is screming at her "I want you and your tortillas... DEAD"
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