i permit you to call me
I asked about his 3 inch scar on his chest. It's from when he had to castrate a bull on the estancia. Apparently this is how good bull meat is made.
My aunt totally just drunk dialed me when i was super stoned, it was so intense
This isnt meant to be as creepy as it sounds, but do you seriously want a lock of the hair I cut off?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
What do you think french fries on pizza would taste like?
i already know. Delicious. Use ranch.
They have 12 kegs and 40 bottles of liquor and a pool with a diving board. And hardly anyone at this wedding knows me. Should be a great night
If our text convos ever saw the light of day lives would be in tatters
jake and the teradactyl broke up, operation get high and find him a new girl who hasn't had sexual experiences with three delts simultaniously is in full effect.
There's a mechanical bull in the basement dude where are you
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Fool me once shame on you. Fool me twice and I'm the idiot missing half an eyebrow again.
wow. there is a man who hates the post office more than me. he is causing a scene, this is a snapshot of elderly me.
I know you're asleep, but I just had a motherfucking epiphany.
its times like this i wish i didnt have a penis
Do you think telling guys I'm majoring in magic is a good pickup line?
Sorry didnt text you yesterday. had to put restraining order on my ex.
Randomize