So when exactly did I get naked and makeout with the statue?
I woke up and she had breakfast in bed for me
RUN RUN RUN RUN
I went for the touchdown every play, and I think I ended up with herpes.
chastity bono is officially a man...and has a really hot girlfriend...life doesn't make sense
I wish the health center treadmills counted beers burned not calories
just had to take a 4 hour nap to write a one page paper. its obviously the week after winter break.
I'm sorry the first time we hungout you had to witness me throw up in the ocean then army crawl to shore.
Is there really anything more beautiful than opening a fresh box of wine on a Friday afternoon?
On a scale of 1-10 how seriously are we considering being sugar babies?
I'm about a 7.95
He put his name in my phone as David Hot Guy With Tattoos and I fell in love because that's what I was going to change his name to anyways
One does not fall in love, one falls flat on the their face after leaving a bar
I enjoy the level of friendship we have achieved until you ask me to determine what may or may not be gentile warts via iphone pic
Before you started puking your brains out, you took a moment to give me the correct order of the Harry potter series
What's with guys asking if I wanna "kick it" like I'm some fucking 19 year old
last night is slowly putting itself back together. Its one giant slutty puzzle, all the pieces are covered in tequila and shame.
Randomize
