Apparently at one point I was wearing my sweatshirt backwards like it was normal and then I threw up into the hood. Never drinking again.
well we can cross tagging a chick in a movie theatre off the list of things to do before we die
if you made me into a cookie and threw me into a betty crocker easy bake oven on christmas morning...that's how baked i am
He's a firefighter, who has his own band. I'm pregnant just thinking about him.
She sang Bad Romance to me. Not really the answer I was looking for.
The hospital said it would be 'irresponsible' for them to allow people to book stomach pumps.
Still in Rome. Hooked up with frat boy from SoCal that's studying abroad. He said he was 1/8 italian. I'll take it.
Hypothetically speaking, what is the proper response if one gets bitten by a most likely not rabid squirrel? Hypothetically.
Another day, another engagement, another cat
Am I over stepping my bounds if I ask to fuck in your new bathroom?
It has heated floors
We got a lap dance! I touched a boob!
I've decided that buying my first unused mattress has been my first major step into real adulthood.
I don't care if he's the coolest coworker, if he's living in his mom's basement at 30 you should not buy drugs from him
How was your night?
Fell down a flight of stairs. Went to a sex dungeon. Was approached by a man in a leather harness.
So on a scale of 1-10 how mad would you be if I sent you a picture from the inside of a strip club
Randomize
