i couldnt tell she was wearing a bumpit until she started giving me head
girls just need to accept the fact that i'm going to make out with their boyfriends
The worst mistakes make the best memories. Write that down.
I love online classes. Spent the last part of my lecture taking apart a teabag and filling it with weed.
Can you confirm that Victor fucked a girl for Jack in the Box tacos?
I cannot, but I know he fucked a girl for a Nerf hoop and a "Kingpin" dvd.
well in DOG beers, i've only had one
I just had cybersex with some guy from the Netherlands for 2 HOURS instead of doing my History project...how's your break going?
despite the cops showing up at 8am, pre gaming groundhog day was my idea yet. and by pre gaming, i of course mean getting black out drunk by 7:30am
Seriously, dude... You knows its bad when you gag on her nipple.
I'm going to keep a tally of how many lives I ruin this summer. Starting today.
Already at 3 and it's not even noon.
The less fucks you give, the more fucks you get. Kinda like "a penny saved is a penny earned" but with vagina.
I told him I felt we were at the point where if I saw him talking to another girl, I'd probably choke him out. So I guess you could say things are getting serious.
I know it was your bday but bringing a airhorn and blowing it yelling "buy me a fucking shot" in the bartenders face was a little uncalled for
I put a zucchini in my pussy for you
you never know when your going to find a surprise from me in your bed...it keeps you on your toes.
Randomize
