I just ate a drumstick out of the garbage. I need a life coach.
Spotted: jayne dropping her cigarettes in a puddle...then picking them back up and putting them in her pocket. If i ever get that desperate, stop talking to me
It's just like soggy cereal, but cancerous
i wanna give whoever invented massage chairs a blow job.
I was high enough to understand and function with 'flip' while playing brick breaker
Damn. I don't think I could ever be that high.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It just feels wrong masturbating with my neighbor's cat in my apartment
Beer bonged 7 shots of Jameson. I title this night short stories with tragic endings.
Bouncy castle Catalina wine-mixer race for the cure. It will be as fun as it sounds
It's okay. My lingerie drawer is skanky enough for the two of us. Even across borders.
Whiskey and an unstable home life is apparently the fountain that 20-something boys like to drink from.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Is "when in doubt date the guy with the bigger dick" a good philosophy?
Jesus, I just want to drink. Also simultaneously punch things and rub my vagina on them.
Just sent a dick pic to ur girl. It was accident. Plz mail it to Gena.
So I got cockblocked by our relationship status last night
Our sex from this weekend should be engraved into a plaque or commemorated somehow. It was fucking amazing.
Just realized how behind i am. Will gradually increase drinking until i don't remember that i missed an entire year of class.
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