last night i used 411 to try and contact britney spears.
dollar well spent
I realized today that the only reason you made out with Travis is because he has nice teeth
So I just used shazaam to figure out a pairs figure skating song. I don't think I could get any gayer.
He was sitting on the bathroom floor, swirling his finger in the toilet singing the Laguna Beach theme song. I don't know whether to laugh or help him.
I'm starting to blur the boundary between reasonable senioritis and self-destruction. Somewhat-openly hittin the flask in 11am class
You're about to fuck a guy with a sweatshirt tied around his waist like a mensurating 13 year old. Get your priorities straight, you're graduating tomorrow.
Just for the record its a bit awkward when you introduced me to your friends at your house as your brother and then insisted in front of them that I sleep in your bed with you
Be subtle and tell lucas that he should sleep here tonight. And by subtle, i mean show him this text...
Your level of morning after guilt is too much right now. Do less.
don't give me stepladders when i'm stoned.. i woke up to a slice of balogna nailed to the ceiling
Also you can't just sext a Michelle quote from Full House.
After you punched me you ran away and it took an hour to find you... On the wrong floor... Sitting alone saying "it doesnt make sense"
How did delivering mac n cheese to my drug dealer become a two hour outing?
If I die tonight, you and your brother can split my money evenly for college only.
all $38?
You guys do the cocaine and I'll do the dishes.
Randomize
