I have a walk of shame I should be getting to. "Hey, by the way, what is your name?" is not a conversation I want to have today
ok so i jsut did the walk of shame with this random guy that i had sex with at the hotel party, and the lady at the front desk said "wow you're just now leavin?"
ron's 8" boning knife is for sale. oh and it comes with a flavor injector.
High?
hahahahaha turkey breast
I'm playing a drinking game with nyc prep. This will not end well for meeee
Everytime the gay dude pretends he's not gay, drink a cosmo. Everytime the crosseyed girl is crosseyed, kill her
Her vagina should come with caution tape.
I hope God doesn't listen to everybody on a Saturday night.
It makes me feel uncomfortable and unsafe when he licks my pants
tuesday night obama will do an address about the oil spill at 8... it'll only be about 15 minutes... but i think thats plenty of time for a drinking game. key words "oil" "bp" and "responsibility"?
Fuck yes. Let's make bingo cards.
You weren't a difficult drunk to take care of. I just had to stop you from plunging the toilet once or twice.
He told me that a camel appeared out of nowhere and it told him to quit smoking...
I got to explain to the guys at work today how i had no choice but to go to a gay bar because I was handcuffed to a lesbian.
I found pix on her phone of me passed out and her sticking things up my ass. Its over.
It's something I can't competently describe without making sex sounds.
Update: tequila girl had her hand down groomsmen pants
Masturbating to death wouldn't be a terrible way to go. If you die tonight, I'll know how it went down. Promise not to tell your family.
Randomize
