some guy just got out of his chair quietly. Laid down on the floor and is now asleep in between rows in my lecture hall. He must have had a rough night.
That can be our thanksgiving, vodka and cornbread. Just like the pilgrims.
im at a loss of words.... a stripper is dancing to a Justin Bieber song.
The KFC double down is way too much for a drunk. He was just staring at it in awe.
Quiet hours sex sucks. I hate finals.
The Wii Fit is already telling me I'm an alcoholic.
My epitaph should read "Margaritas: she never learned"
We just saw him running from campus police a few minutes ago. So no, I don't think he's still passed out on the quad.
Keep your head up. His game is good, and you should be honoured to be a notch on his wall. If it makes you feel better, if it wasn't you, it was going to be me.
The way I'm gonna look at it is, if you don't makeout with your roommate once in college, you didn't do something right.
I made a blanket fort and am drinking Gatorade and eating donuts watching 500 days of summer. I can't keep spending my saturdays like this.
The staples of my diet are Labatt Blue, Xanax, and brick cheese.
I should have never moved out...
We smoked weed. AS A FAMILY. IT WAS BEAUTIFUL.
she went outside...danced, got some snow, and put cherry vodka in it. she was so proud of herself.
she brought her phone charger to the bar this bitch is ready to drink
Randomize