1. Mark my dj buddy and I spent $1000 on bottles last night
2. We were casually offered narcotics while walking down the street
3. I will still be awake when you start school tmw, cause there's no last call
So if any tells you miami is the same as the rest of america, there are just lying to you
she cant drink. allergic to alcohol.
ewwww. she might as well have a dick.
Dude, I just had an awesome rave/orgy with like bunch of hot Asian chicks on a cable car. It was like being in a Gwen Stefani video, cept w/o the bad spelling
God, I love San Francisco.
drunk tastebuds have low standards.
I just went to pick up my pigeon from your house. You should be getting a picture soon
We stuck the straw in the bourbon as a joke, you saw it as a challenge.
surprisingly organic peanut butter is not the best chaser
I really think that guy just walks around with tennis balls in his pocket. No dick is that big
it's my birthday, i should be around people i want to fuck
No gay bar. My eyemake up looks like sex and Im using these dick daggers of mine tonight.
Once again I am on the toilet and refuse to get up
What a great time to reflect on life
No, supporting your unemployed boyfriend IS NOT what credit cards are for.
Showed up to family party blacked out and in a turkey costume. I'd say thanksgiving was a success.
Just set out 2 water bottles as an offering to my hungover self.
I love when my neighbors have passionate, loud sex to remind me that I'm not getting laid
Randomize
