the cure to his relationship is in or around my vagina.
She seriously needs to find another hobby other than bouncing on cock.
I wish I could rss feed the hooker ads on craigslist because it looks suspicious that I check craigslist every hour.
My family is watching Intervention and taking notes. I need to leave NOW!
Accidentally spilled a drink on her roommates skirt, offered to clean it, and got a blowjob out of the deal. Something went horribly right.
I don't understand but I fell asleep naked holding a tub of cool whip and a boiled egg
I hope the dean has a raincoat on because I'm prolly gonna throw up on him when I get my degree
There's a skateboard on the patio and all the chips are gone. The note on the fridge says 'don't buy cheese'. Stop letting her go outside.
I'm sorry you were dumb enough to get played by a male cheerleader
I hurt myself, but I'm pretty sure I saved the carpet.
he played intl players anthem 4me and ate a strawberry out of my pussy
HIS DICK IS GLORIOUS AND I WANT TO RIDE IT TO VALHALLA
At least your vagina gets to vagina again. Dust that thing off.
There's nothing like when u really click with a stripper
Woke up with a $100 bill from the Philippines in my bra & an unopened box of sour patch kids next to me. I have some questions.
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