Is it possible to jerk off a nipple?
We're talking about addictions in class and there's a girl 2 rows in front of me on Farmville. Hello, example.
I've been here 20 minutes and some creepy old man told me he wanted to know what my insides felt like. I hate gay bars.
When you're opening a bottle of tequila with a golf club, it's probably time to stop drinking...
he just kept saying "come on iron man, you can do this!" to himself the whole time..
yes we did fuck in his chapter room. yes it was demeaning. and yes, they probably will discuss it at chapter tonight.
obviously my window is still shattered. they're pressure washing my condo today. i think i need a bloody mary.
Russian roulette. Between salvia and weed. You in?
FUCK YOU MAN
I can't wait to see you again...not a euphemism, just really looking forward to seeing you. Wanting to fuck you as often as possible just seems implied at this point.
Also I'm sorry for asking you to shave my vagina for me last night
When he was going down on me I referred to him as "Lord Snow" and HE GOT IT. HE GOT THE GAME OF THRONES REFERENCE. I AM IN LOVE
Snow days are when you really appreciate that your neighbor is on your bang roster.
I just delete my bank app from my phone to have enough storage to download tindr. Is this my life now?
He's a drill sergeant! The sadomasochist in me can't resist that.
I'm now forever going to blame miss frizzle for making me the sexual deviant that I am today
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