Don't worry I'll hold the wheel while you cum
You are not answering and I think it is because you spent 80 dollars worth of drinks on you hot cousin.
Last night was proof dads should hug their daughters more
Would it be inappropriate to do lines in front of the cable guy?
i'm trying to figure out what goes best with beef ramen. a 2007 merlot or a 2008 pinot noir? i'm leaning toward the pinot noir.
Try and take me seriously and don't look directly at my hair or the jizz on my pants.
yo btw licking skeptical coke off table right now
There are so many things that would come back to haunt me if I ran for President someday.
like that video of you mad stoned vomiting in the bdubs parking lot after going to a pizza buffet screaming how you needed to make room for froyo
Wat
Considering the fact that everyone took the wrong jacket from that party, should we casually try to return the chalice and soccer ball we stole from last night?
Hooked up with an ex Playgirl model. I feel like the universe just high-fived me for staying sober.
She kept asking for cigarettes, than just put them in her purse as "savings"
pssssst. you dropped everyone else off and forgot about me. im in the backseat of your car still. can you please come back outside and either let me out or take me home?
And at the semi-adult age of 25 I have shit my pants. Not even drunk, just really late to work. Is this real life?
The look of disappointment from my cat while I take nudes...
Hey, you should go to your facebook ASAP... i'm guessing you're wasted but you just uploaded a picture of someones dick...and everyones taking bets now if its Rick or Mikes..
Randomize
