Seeya bye Latvian government! Whammy!
I'd rather watch my mom take a shit while reading the sunday new york times than watch mama mia .
she had condoms in her med. cabinet - magnums -I don't think I'm tall enough for this ride
it was really bad. he went around saying "I want you inside of me" to everyone.
So I love how we keep introducing our friends to sex toys. It's like pay it forward vibrator edition.
I didn't know he had a girlfriend until after we had sex when he said, "Man I really gotta stop cheating on my girlfriend."
Oh Julie took your pants off last night, I put your pajama bottoms on, and Rachel took your bra off. It takes a village.
..puke & rally mid art final. HAPPY CINCO DE MAYO!
He just walked in the house and decided to wake everyone up by yelling "I SHIT MYSELF!" We all thought he was joking....we were all wrong.
I think the best part was the fact that the stripper's lock screen was a picture of the virgin mary
Self reach around competition is what the Olympics has been missing all along. A true test of athleticism.
Ok you had this coming you put a sponsored filter on a dick pic
Drunk you wants to be petty, not you you.
I LinkedIn messaged people about jobs when I was blacked out
Dude this weed has me so paranoid.
Yeah tell me about it I just screamed after I coughed because my own cough scared me.
Randomize
