why does hillary duff have a greatest hits album?
I just stuffed five dollars in my near empty box of camels to remind myself to buy more. And my mom says I don't budget my money
our school mascot just walked into class and threw condoms everywhere. welcome to college
I'm making tacos. Give me one good reason why we shouldn't be high while eating those tacos.
I just figured you know how to drive a boat and I know how to get drunk. What can go wrong
I guess I just got drunk and ordered a mini fridge off the internet. At least now I know the 200$ that was missing from my checking account wasn't spent on lap dances only.
sooo what's the appropriate music to listen to after you find out the dude you been fucking, is legit married with kids...what genre is that?
if the future wants me to fuck him, then i guss i have to
I think I'm gonna quit partying for awhile. Piercing my own nose is where I draw the line.
My mom just gave me my fake back to buy her more wine.
Let's run into the wild and just eat berries and have sex all the time.
literally just tried sending to someone a video of me jerkin but my phone was connected to Apple TV and it literally just played on the tv in a full room and I'm actually about to shit myself
I put on pants and a bra for you and you never showed up. There is no forgiveness for that.
I was just thinking about all the dick I could catch while I am home. But then I realized I am too lazy to get out of my pjs and leave my cat.
He described his sex dream about me using only emojis
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