Since my computer broke, i've been masterbating to girls gone wild. I feel like i'm in the 90's.
just ate frosted cheerios in coffee with some marshmellows. the college diet begins
I making dinner, so you might want to actually come home tonight.
oh, you finally did the dishes then?
No, bought new ones.
She's a Laker fan, her sister is a Celtic fan... no matter who wins I'm getting a celebration bj from one of them!
i was so fucked up i thought i was at home depot
somehow a sneeze triggered me puking over everyone in the car
Hey, this is Travis. I just so intelligently deduced that I am in a college dorm somewhere in western oregon. Probably WOU, based on the process of elimination.
Half the people who compete die. All the rest either lose their minds or grow an innate fear of sharks, vodka, and fishbowls
After it was shut down sean literally made out with four separate girls between the 100 feet to our house. It was a rampage.
Stop confusing me with every girl you know that doesn't like sex.
I'm too high and old for this...
Dude, she had a pound of gunpowder in her closet. I for sure got a fear boner.
We played 2 very competitive games of Jenga and then fucked our brains out... BEST. RELATIONSHIP. EVER.
I peed in Andys sink the other day bc I didnt want him to hear me pee
Best night if my life? Time I got eaten out in the backseat of a M5 while eating White Castle. Then he fucked me. Perfect
Randomize
