first missing my period. then crying at the clinic... but why?
we had sex 3 months ago. you missed your period 2 weeks ago. but nice try.
I know we didn't hook up because i was still wearing my fanny pack in the morning
He grabbed every salt shaker in the apartment and we haven't seen him since. He really really doesn't want to shovel snow anymore.
Don't upload the drink o meter to your google calendar. Somehow binge drinking looks even worse with a time stamp.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I owe you a thank you for last night. Only you could go up to a guy, ask if he likes my boobs, and return later to find us in a full on dance floor makeout sesh. Well played.
I think I'm just going to up-end a bottle of wine and look through pictures of what my life used to be.
This bitch rocks a fuckin fanny pack and still manages to lose her phone at every thirsty thursday
He was talking up his golf swing like other guys talk up their dick. Is this adult dating or just another flavour of douchery?
He's listening to "my heart will go on" by himself in the living and its not even noon. MAKE IT STOP.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Remember Christopher who always sends me pictures of his penis? Look to your right, boy in the blue.
Woke up on the floor with shoes on my hands...I'd say it was a success
Our prom king just sent me a dick pic. I know it's 10 years later but I feel like I've finally made it.
I ate 1200 calories worth of chocolate covered marshmallows and googled why it is okay to be single forever
why is there a thong in the fridge-NOT MINE-and a half of a pickle on the stairs?!
I don't wear thongs. The picle was for dipping. Ill explain later. Lacy or plain thong ?
I deserve a medal for being woke up at 6am on my day off by your mother asking where your brother is
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