God I can't wait to have my phone textbombed every night
his ringtone is the jonas brothers. get me the fuck out of here NOW.
Was just grinding with my bio TA. She asked why i wasnt studying
Her boobs looked like leather oven mitts. No more cougar hunting for awhile.
I've been meaning to ask you. The first night in the city did we do key bumps with a suicidal homeless man? My memory is fuzzy
He made me meet him in the baby department of walmart where he was waiting with his pregnant girlfriend. Time for a new dealer
So my mom and I were talking about what I should get you for christmas. She made it clear I cannot get christmas lingerie.
I called him and he said hell call me back hes in the middle of his kareokee song he was out by himself and his dog
This coke is making my nose hairs dance. That good.
I just burped smoke on the bus. Hello 6:48am
Somebody really needs to come home and pick up the used condom from the middle of the wood room floor. It's blue, if that helps decide who comes - uh, home.
He said he wanted to start giving out "sex souvenirs". I got a poster with a penguin on it.
Dear God, please let me get my period. And if this one is fiercer than usual I completely understand.
Being sober is no fun. Karaoke and not wearing pants are not socially acceptable things to do anymore and this depresses me.
Do you think it would be weird to add her on Facebook?
You just commited a felony act together, I honestly think we're beyond this.
Randomize
