I need to stop having one night stands with guys in my building so I can have someone to borrow milk from without it being awkward
I'm leaving my hospital band on when we go drinking tonight. I'm aiming for pity sex.
To this day, he introduces me as "the girl I met climbing trees at 3 A.M."
someone to text and fuck? since when does that constitute a relationship?
since 2006
You don't know commitment until you try and waterproof a non-waterproof vibrator
I feel as if the hash cupcakes on top of mushroom chocolates was a little excessive last night
Dude it's SB. It's a proven fact that all you need to survive on is beer, weed, chips and maybe some amphetamines
I draw, I play three woodwind instruments, I press buttons for eight hours at work and Im studying to be a gynecologist... I guarantee I can make you squirt, babe.
is there any kind of "im boning my neighbor and he happens to be a manager at walmart" discount that our new relationship entitles me to??
I was in the bathroom and I heard a phone ding inside one of the stalls. I really wanted to say, nature is calling, but I was still in my work uniform
when I called the strip club they said there was a note with my credit card. "girl who punched guy in throat" fuck daytona
I have to sleep with him. We're too much alike. It's like clash of the titans, except instead of clashing, he's putting it in me.
I feel so accomplished. I've cleaned my room, done laundry, called those places, gotten jobs, and masturbated.
I'm so proud of you.
Worst sex ever! He was a talker for sure! I was on top and out of no where he said "Oh you bad bitch?" I stopped and left.
Got upgraded to First Class and now I’ve got the whole Pacific Ocean to seduce the very hot gentleman sitting next to me!!! Door closing, wish me luck!
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