I just threw up, I'm either bulemic or pregnant, and I'm now accepting bets on which it is
so just incase you wake up on the couch wondering how you got there--you came home at 7am, put ice in a cup--then you proceeded to put the cup in the microwave and melt it because you "wanted water". you then, fell down the stairs while saying "you don't know me" then crawled to the couch.
I get free beer too. Its called a vagina and its accepted everywhere like visa
I don't care if its bassically 3rd world. A country without a drinking age is a country without a drinking age.
being alone eating nachos and drinking from a giant munchen beermug really isnt that sad
i promise ill be ok...btw im only considered "not ok" if i end up in the hospital.
I'm about to pick up E from underneath a random doormat.......how is this remotely normal?
Sorry I couldn't make it...got a scrambled voicemail, all I heard was "Bring the dildo"
All I see when I think of you are dancing penis angels around your head.
She knocked me and my drink to the ground with her ass. I have never been mad at someone for having a glorious booty.
I asked him if we were going to get arrested for doing it in the bar parking lot. "Absolutly not" said the guy getting the blow job...
COVER ME IN BACON THATS MY FETISH
ACTUALLY ITS NOT, I HAVE NO FUCKING IDEA WHAT AWAKENS THE MONSTER BELOW THE BELT
Of course I fucked him. He was wearing a rainbow cock sock and cowboy boots.
I was just told I’m pretty enough to be a catfish. This made me so happy...
i think i'm just going to start having sex with his brother, he's much hotter and it would definately be less illegal.
Randomize
