This chick, for whatever reason, has serious "Leave your wife and kids and also break up her young marriage in order to frolick for a good 2 weeks before I realize that she's just like the rest of them and I made a huge mistake and ruined a lot of lives in the process" potential. It's SO INTRIGUING.
guy picked up a cops taser, thing shot him in the neck, he went down and pissed himself, cop started laughing and hasnt called an ambulance.
Using 'equal to a modern day cock block" in term paper, inappropriate
Let me start this apology by saying I'm sorry that I bit your penis.
He won't stop licking me..... im choosing your date next time.
We lost Kevin again. Probably kidnapped by fattie 2 or butter-face 2 from last night. We need names and any information you can give us. Last scene with his shoe laces converted into a belt.
This from the guy I found eating salad out of a pot lid in his boxers on his porch last night.
The problem with never associating with your roommate is that you never know if they're dead in their room with the door closed or just gone for the weekend...I sprayed some febreeze just in case.
I thought of you this morning when I woke up in a bed with a girl wrapped in duct tape dressed as a coors light can.
thank god we only have to drink eggnog and rum once a year. It taste like shit.
He said I could pay him back in blow jobs. What's the going rate for those these days?
You need to call dibs on the blond with the tits. It's your birthday.
Haha hell yea
Because if someone gets to see those.. It should be you. It's like God telling you Happy Birthday.
..and by hang out i don't mean fucking then going back home i mean let's get something to eat & watch a movie and fuck sometime in between.
He punched me in the face while giving him road head, because he was driving stick. I shit you not.
Just bought 2 liters of wine and frozen waffles for dinner. Is this 30?
Randomize
