It looked like if robin williams had a vagina
Martha Stewart would most definitely roll a great joint.
I wanna get FUCKED up and fail the piss test at my eval so they send me to detox and give me suboxone... Is that bad?
Some chick just barfed in my math class. Everyone here is hungover. Yay community college
This is like the time you took a picture of your knees and told him it was your tits, isn't it?
Decided in my tanked state last night purchase 2 weeks worth of xanax, so I can guess my way thru this week and finals. Soberly, I decided it would be a great way to test my knowledge of finance.
Leaving my wallet at work and not going out to drink tonight...SIGN FROM THE UNIVERSE.
I just used bulldog clips for nipple clamps. Also, a wooden spoon as a paddle. DYI Domination or Ghetto Bondage?
reason #326 why I'm still single.... my date just told me there's a little boy ghost that lives in his closet because he likes his music.
I just had to break into my old house and steal my sex tape. Good times. How have you been?
And I threw up 26 times yesterday. I actually think I threw up a spider too.
I almost wanna stick a tampon in and sneeze bent over to see if it actually shoots out
i looked that guy up on facebook. the one who went down on me for two hours
what's the verdict
i've been scrubbing my vag all morning
I just ran into my psychology professor at Planned Parenthood she asked why I was there and I asked why she was there and it turns out we both had a scare.#bonding because of abortion.
Just fucked my ex's brother. It is clear I dated the wrong one. Is it wrong for me to continue to fuck this one?
Randomize