I imagine anything that isn't a dilldo attached to a jackhammer, powered by a generator won't be amazing enough for you
Real friends wouldn't let me shotgun a 4loko after already seeing me trying to eat a girl out through her jeans.
He wants to know how I lost my bra in his pants....id like to know too
I deserve like a purple heart or something. I just made it all the way drunk through my 2 story house without making a sound. While carrying a trombone.
You may see me wearing your shirt to class. It's because I still have the spins and I'm anticipating throwing up on it. Asshole.
There's jack Daniels coming out of my eyes instead of tears.
Oh hey. I left my beer there. Beer is more important than my pride. I want to pick that up.
Fuck you asshole. You cost me cheerleader pussy.
Please note that in response to your post about your dog's jaws clamped hard around a stick, I did not comment, "Takes after his dad." You're welcome.
She was a little thick, but we banged on the beach and fireworks went off as we finished so I think God wanted it
They had an Olympic theme party at her work yesterday. She brought home her fake gold medal and hung it on my cock after she rode me.
As a member of the kink community, I feel grossly misrepresented
and then the sword just ended up between my legs
Chasing shots with airborne.. Gonna get rid of my sickness and my soberness.
I’m inviting a few of my favorite manwhores to a pool party. Bring booze and wear your banana hammock so Amy can see what I’m always talking about
Randomize
