Weren't you self-described as an 'arab' slut?
No?
Well my cheeks are red now
I couldn't get internet on my iPod in this hotel room for porn, so I made due with UFC.
I'm not sure what to say to that.
either way he was missing a nipple.
I couldn't walk, so he carried me all the way home; and then I told him that I wasn't drunk enough to fuck him. Poor kid.
The preggo girl brought her pet chipmunk to class today. fyi.
I just had a flashback of 4:30am: me hugging the toilet bowl and you handing me a jar of pickles to open. There is something seriously wrong with us.
there was a fucking fire juggler. but it was ok bc i was in the kiddie pool and it was the safe zone
I'm taking stock of m life as of right now and my Friday night plans are to drink a 30 rack by myself so I can have a tv stand when it is finished
He just stared into my eyes and touched himself. That isn't hooking up.
He ate the contents of an ashtray and didn't puke, I think he can handle drinking a fifth to himself.
I rather not break my neck. It's hard to look sexy with a neck cast.
250 people in this lecture & my prof asks who already drank green beer this morning& is drunk right now. I WAS THE ONLY ONE TO RAISE MY HAND
Ick. That's not even the fun kind of punishment.
Comedy Central is in dire need of more sitable faces late at night - Trevor Noah has a baby face - there are federal rules against those types of sexual fantasies
That chick keeps sending eggplant emojis
Welcome to dating in the digital age. Better catch up now that you’re divorced
and eggplant is code for penis. It means she’s DTF. Go get her tiger!!!
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