R and i have drinken 4 bottles od red wine. By ourselfs
I wonder if all of the nights I blacked out will be revealed to me when I die. Have you ever thought about that?
Have you ever noticed how boring internet porn is after you cum? I can't shut my computer fast enough.
You watched "From Justin to Kelly" and sang along to more than half of the songs. I didn't know whether to laugh or to be insanely frightened that you knew almost all the lyrics.
I had sex on an exercise ball. The inevitable has occurred.
You insisted I take photos of you vomiting off the top of the tree.
I like the odds of his and my children being professional athletes too. To support me in my old age, see I do think about the future.
the tv said "its small, its comfortable..." and i started laughing... safe to say he lost any dignity he had left...
I've had more jaegerbombs than I can count on 3 fingers
He was super adorable, like I wanna pinch his cheeks while I fuck him...
I don't WANT a sex disease! Especially one assigned to me by my supervisor..
I accepted my type is not "conventionally attractive" when she asked me "Him? Are you sure?" 5 times in front of him last night
I just wanna fuck your brother. Sorry if thats a crime.
Do not let Mike show you his naughty Santa Claus outfit. It's a super long beard and crotchless pants.
His wife found the thong I “forgot” in his glovebox
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