How old was that tiny chick? she needs a lard iv.
he told me he had a problem with me going both ways. like what the fuck. what guy says that to a girl? goodbye planned threesomes...
like the penis drawn on my face is so detailed and well done, i'm not even upset about it.
The movie was so bad she gave me two blowjobs. Two.
Seriously man, I'm worried that my dick's going to fall off someday if I keep this up...
Of course I'm hard in the pics. If there's a chance that these pictures will cause a scandal later in my life I at least want my dick to look it's biggest
Food Network. Taking bong rips everytime we want to eat. BOBBY FLAY.
My clothes are covered in blood and I feel like I drank a gallon of elephant cum...it's safe to say I'm hungover
Can we agree to not tell mom about this?
This isnt even the most disappointing thing i know about you.
can't believe I traded a good night's sleep and a midterm for your blurry tits
I shoulda been born a dude. There's too much power in a vagina.
Don't trim your pubes if you've been drinking. I can't believe I have to tell you more than once.
now to finish some work and then i think i'll work out. or garden. or at the very least I'll continue eating frozen grapes and take more drugs
Never underestimate the power of titties
Normally getting fucked up with the owner and suggesting he motorboat me wouldn’t help my chances of a promotion, but this is 2020 and he definitely enjoyed it
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