Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

ADVERTISEMENT

ADVERTISEMENT

ADVERTISEMENT

Sorry simpin1985 hasn't picked any favorites yet.

ADVERTISEMENT

(336): View more from North Carolina

If I die tonight, I want you to know that your sister is awesome in bed

Fav 20 8699 1822
share tweet
(818): View more from California

apparently "my dealer got arrested" is not an acceptable answer when mom asks "What happened? You look sad today"

Fav 20 6977 2836
share tweet

ADVERTISEMENT

(817): View more from Texas

he turned the pretty ricky playlist on. its about to go down.

Fav 16 4905 1362
share tweet
(717): View more from Pennsylvania

this is the second time this week i got a blowjob from a crying girl.

Fav 19 1964 4533
share tweet
(616): View more from Michigan

Romney sounds like a middle school girl and that creepy ass smile makes me want to close my blinds

Fav 9 1519 810
share tweet
(208): View more from Idaho

He showed up at my house, drunk, proclaiming that he needed to fuck me...my dad let him in

Fav 10 3631 1217
share tweet

ADVERTISEMENT

(314): View more from Missouri

Just peed in the fountain while its snowing. Fell flat on my ass, literally my butt naked ass in a pile of snow. It's safe to say I'm done with drinking on weekdays

Fav 3 757 638
share tweet

ADVERTISEMENT

(864): View more from South Carolina

The memory of your penis haunts me. I must learn to be satisfied with lesser men than you.

Fav 3 897 457
share tweet

ADVERTISEMENT

(480): View more from Arizona

the universe is starting to freak me out.. ive now had sex with 3 people who were born on the same day..

Fav 0 32 12
share tweet

ADVERTISEMENT