Ill do this for you.
You are a team player.
This is me making up for not putting my tongue inside you more.
May God have mercy on my new vibrator.
I was hitting on her while she was puking ... yeah i was pretty drunk
It was one of those "I have no idea if this will ever happen again so I can't say no" opprotunities. Part of me was like, "You slut" and the bigger part was screaming, "Hell yeah"
can you come back were all locked out and alyssia's still inside passed out on the floor but more importantly i left a beer in there that's not finished
When he left he said something to the effect of "well now that I've been used..." I think he may be on to me.
i was drinking at the bar last night with a guy with no bottom teeth, wearing zubas and a polka dotted hat. if that isn't the definition of wisconsin, i dont know what is
And you will no longer be getting a thank you note from my vagina
Anxiously awaiting my period drinking Hershey's syrup from the bottle. Don't judge me
Found out I slept with someone who likes Pitbull. I really should get to know someone better before I sleep with them.
I told her the party couldn't handle my playlist LAZERBAWLS and I was right. Cops in the basement, orgy in the kitchen, jousting in the living room.
To the point, I hope I remember where to put my dick when I finally get laid again
You have a 50 50 chance
only I would find a long lost relative through a craigslist casual encounters ad
last night i fell off a barstool and busted my nose. i can regretfully say that i didn't see cherub last night.
At the light, his mom pulled up next to us while I was giving him road head. He forgot to tell me she was meeting us at the movie. So long story short, I convinced her I drove myself, pick me up in 20.
Randomize
