I puked the same amount of times as the number of bars i went to last night
hey im gonna send you a picture of my dinner
if its a picture of your dick again we are no longer friends
and this is why I hate my dad. He got 25x more angry with me when I wanted to drive a different route then he suggested to get to his house (more scenic- thus more enjoyable) then he did when I told him I was driving drunk with 4 people in the car and I got my 5th speeding ticket last night.
We'll make it into fun. If I can make wii bowling into a drinking game, I can make studying spanish into a sex game.
We tried to play doctor all sexually then he was taking down my 'symptoms' I said I needed to puke he thought it was part of the game
I haven't had nearly enough lesbian experiences to fully commit to this relationship.
Learned my lesson. Pink pantydroppers out of a beer bong=deceiving
I sent him pictures of just me in my thong and he replied "you're so sweet, you make me feel special <3".... Oh.
dude he passed out in the strip club on his birthday, WHILE he was getting a lap dance. That drunk.
Who shows up to work two weeks ago still drunk and freshly high on blow and gets a promotion and a raise? This girl. Good at business. Super good at being fucked up.
I'd say tonight was pretty successful. I rode an iron horse naked and sweet talked myself out of an MIC while wearing a bra filled with four loko.
We were walking home from Pluckers (read carrying your drunk ass) and out of nowhere you yelled "Say bitch you got a Facebook?" at a random chick walking by.
I just realized my new apartment is at the corner of Patrick Henry and Mary Jane.
Give me weed or give me death?
Stop chatting and get in the fucking car. I didn't get my asexual ass out of bed just to watch you flirt and fail with someone you're never going to see again.
she went outside...danced, got some snow, and put cherry vodka in it. she was so proud of herself.
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