this kid just came up to me and asked me if i wanted to play truth or aids with him and his friends. i'm in
Applied 4 a nanny job usin a Legit Site. Xplain to me how the couple I found offered me a 3some complete with 'sexy pics' of the wife blowin hubby. wtf?
obviously you're part succubus.
My lunch today consisted of going on the brewery tour with my boss. Free pretzels and two free beers.
I hate you.
To be fair, the beers are only 8 ounces each. So maybe you just kinda dislike me.
i googled "where to have sex in disneyland." i found nothing.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
finding my wedding ring encrusted in vomit this morning really just topped off last night...
you told his mom that the only thing he wants for christmas is his dick in your mouth
the weed was in a baggy that had little penguins on it. i am so excited you have no idea
okay. so this hammed chick got arrested and she keeps trying to make out with the cop. i like her style.
Currently microwaving whipped cream to make white Russians and hotboxing the kitchen while this random kid is dancing in the corner.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
they night at the roxbarryed us. came out of nowhere,bought us shots, and then the big one licked my hand? we got out of that noise.
i knew it was time to leave the bar when i caught myself doing karate dance moves with a married man.
We didnt even know he was in the house until he came downstairs and asked why he was wet
can't decide if i look like a hooker or a missing member of Poison today
Called my ex last night, told her I wanted to bang like we use too, her fiance was in the car, I was on speaker phone. NO MORE TEQUILA!
Did she say Ok?
Who knew removing piercings would be so radical?
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