Uggggg i want to leave and get bombed over baghdad
weddingsv make me drug and hornr
No, computers are like whores. moody bitches that cost too much and no matter how much protection you have you can still get a virus
I dont know why the TSA people are looking at me wierd. I mean there is no way i am the only hungover college girl here with nine tally marks on her hand and last nights glitter on her face
Did you not learn anything for "HERPES SCARE 2010".........
until he told me my vag was like a juicy apple and he loved eating it, yes, i really did think we were both sober.
Let's get really high and wear fake mustaches and try not to laugh at each other...
Do you have any pix of it limp? I wanna see the metamorphosis, like a cock caterpillar turning into a giant beautiful cock butterfly!
Forgot my sound was off and didnt even realize it until halfway through because I thought I could hear it. I think high me just narrated half a clip of adventure time
Steaks?
It's Ash Wednesday.
If you really think that not eating meat on a weeknight is going to keep you out of hell, fine. Can I use that chimichurri you made?
That was just an endearing nickname I called you before. I'm not gonna call you a filthy slut now that you are one, I don't want to hurt your feelings.
Went home with a guy last night with Taco Bell sauce in my hair and on my pants
Oh, and Harry Potter. We could be fuck-and-Harry-Potter buddies.
I got copblocked.
What?
Cockblocked. By a cop. Copblocked.
The adults are the big ones right?
Randomize
