She's hot and she went to Notre Dame. I want to fuck the Catholic right out of her
I figure if he loans me money i only owe him sex for the rest of the summer before i pay him back, right?
Astroglide: It's like Bengay for your ass.
got high and went straight for the Doritos. I'm some kind of walking cliche.
A 21st bday and NYE should be illegal to have in the same week...
Ok Ghana you win again. Tell you what...Double or nothing over women's tennis, basketball, hockey, war, baseball, golf, swimming, diving, oil spills, box office proceeds, internet porn sites, criminals incarcerated, women's downhill, bass fishing, NASCAR, or GDP?
i just remember explaining why my socks were better than everyone elses.
I deserve like a purple heart or something. I just made it all the way drunk through my 2 story house without making a sound. While carrying a trombone.
My only downfall is that I can only take shots in twos.
Best part of Friday afternoon drinking? Having ping pong balls thrown into my cleavage.
Just spread butter on my bathrobe. This has been an ace morning.
I STILL HAVE A HARD TIME DECIDING WHAT TO WEAR IN THE MORNING HOW WOULD IT BE POSSIBLE FOR ME TO PICK A PAIR OF PANTS AND GO OH ILL JUST WEAR THESE FOR THE REST OF MY LIFE
Sam was like the mother fucking Moses of drunk and underage kids and he lead them to safety away from the cops. He's a hero that we deserve.
He's got a big dick, a steady job and tells me I'm pretty. There is litterally nothing else I look for I a guy.
my dad just built a flame thrower.. you should probably get here
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