Google if cops ever smoke weeds and then bust them. I need to know immidiately.
new midget porn idea. Wizard of Jizz: Munchkins Revenge
someone just broke into my class and invited everyone to the bar ...now we're filling out a police report. awesome.
This morning is cloudy with a high chance of vomiting all over the dentist. Stay tuned for further updates.
There's sex hanging in the air like a pinata. European people are no joke.
I just got checked out by a paramedic whilst their sirens were on. I'm doing something right
Just had to hide the fact that I'm not wearing underwear from my 7 year old niece.
Based off the amount of cat hair on my poncho....i stole a cat last night.
All I know is I want him to tie me up at least twice a week and I have an overwhelming urge to cook for him. Could this be love? I'm so confused....
Are the transvestites working the counter tonight? Last time I was there they gave me love advice.
He told me I was a good dog mom. I've never been so turned on in my life
You stared at a Swedish dude for like 5 minutes then asked him "shouldn't you be yelling at dragons"
My professor just asked for my number. Not fucking her till after finals though I learned my lesson last time.
Right. Cuz nothing screams "You made it!" quite like selling your used underwear to strangers you met on the internet.
You know that panicky moment when you go home with a guy and realize you’ve been there before?!? HAPPENING RIGHT NOW!!!
Turns out I banged his son a few months ago but the kids back at college so I don’t have to worry about him walking in while Dad has me bent over the couch
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