She had hickeys... what's up with that?? HAHAHA
i have a strong urge to join the asians in the park doing tai chi. I think im still high .
After he finished I threw up my arms and shouted STEVE HOLT!
he was like a christmas ornament you would hang on the back of the tree....not great but still made the cut.
I know we had a good night last night because his turtle was half asleep chewing on the used condom.
I'm hoping to finish this bottle of wine before I pass out, I don't want the remainder spilling on my white down comforter.
I've been thinking about it and if we ever have a threesome it'll start off with us clothed solely in our matching fur vests
It was honestly the most delicious alcohol I've ever drank, plus the added risk of going blind from methanol poisoning really enhanced the experience.
You were screaming across the bar "BUYING US SHOTS ISN'T GOING TO MAKE US STRAIGHT, YA KNOW!!!!!!!!"
He's bought his dick a cell phone. A cell phone. For his dick...
He gave me the number and told me that I if I want to hook up again, I have to call his penis.
While he was gone for spring break I took his head board... I don't wanna wake up from his shenanigans for the rest of my college career.
Let's go dancing. I wanna sprain an ankle. And a labia. My labia or yours. I'm not picky.
I fucked him while wearing his hat. I love the navy
I was cock-blocked by a swat team last night.
On a scale of one to ten how bad is it that the first cardio I've done in months is jogging to the bars?
I'll just go with dedication.
Randomize
