Me too!
Heyy I kind of wanted to apologize and excuse myself for last night. I feel like that was a little much. I just met you. That's why I don't like tequila. Haha
Get out...Run...Or there's going to be a dick in your mailbox
I'm sitting next to this guy at the bar. I wrote him a little song in my head it goes "there is no fucking chance you're getting in my pants" gonna sing it to him after he buys me another drink.
george bush was a better president for first pitches than barack obama. there. i said it.
I just peed on my pajamas. Its gonna be a long night. Don't forget the cookies.
i'm sorry for cheering you on when you were making out with him. i was just celebrating the fact he was decent looking for once
He burnt a smiley face into the screen with a cigarette, peed in my tub and then tried to take off his pants. tried...
Almost just got kicked out of a bar because the locals spilled beer everywhere when we taught them to shotgun.
Since i didn't have a condom I told him to use jump ship method, I think I was overly invested in my sailor costume this year.
we got kicked out of McDonald's because you kept screaming THAT SHIT CRAY at the woman in front of us because she ordered a fish filet.
...that shit cray.
so I found out I could dislocate my shoulders on demand while I was trippin on e last night...
We took a walk on the beach after the bar, he held my hand and kissed me. And then I peed under a lifeguard stand. It was so romantic.
Why can I remember how tall Nicki Minaj is from looking up her height once months ago, yet after weeks into the semester I can't even remember where any my classrooms are located
Importance
i read his ps3 instant messaging thing... he's meeting a guy to have sex. i think your boyfriend's gay
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