this guy just used the pickup line "God must have spent a little more time on you" I recognized the nsync lyric immediately.
do you think women who transgender themselves have the option of getting a circumcised or an uncircumcised dick?
needless to say, I hope she has to get an abortion again
We always say that. And then its 4am and someone is screaming at strippers.
You handed some guy a spoon you found, he yelled SPOON GAME, and then the two of you spent the next 20 minutes throwing spoons all over the kitchen.
When she was dating that guy she told me If they broke up, I would receive a call and no matter what I was doing I'd have to go over a fuck her. It's like being an EMT for sex.
you can hold your grudge or you can accept the alcoholic treats as a peace offering. your choice
peace be with you.
Is it mean to convince my old booty call she used me for sex so I can bang her again before I leave for Denver?
You flew out of the bedroom, stole two Solo cups from the beer pong table, put them on your feet, clicked your heels together three times
It was marvelous. I was drunkenly conversing with my professor in some of the best Spanish I've ever spoken.
His cat just sat there and simultaneously bobbed his head up and down while I blew him
It's scary that my vibrator is a dangerous weapon. I want a new one.
Please come check out theses cougars grinding on a pole. I feel like they're showing us up and we need a duel stat
You got into an extremely loud argument with a juggalo and slapped him, he started crying and everyone cheered.
I remember that, it happened before I started drinking. I thought you said I did something shameful?
I'm just trying to figure out the reason why humans wear socks....
Randomize
