first missing my period. then crying at the clinic... but why?
we had sex 3 months ago. you missed your period 2 weeks ago. but nice try.
Did I tell you he has dinosaur sheets?
let's have our labels/stereotypes/careers for each kid by next week.
oh how i love working at summer camp.
dude she wont stop talking about little people big world...she said my penis looked like zach roloff and took a picture with her phone?
my dad just beat the shit out of me cuz i blew my nose on one of my dirty t shirts and he saw it and thought it was cum.
I guess on the plus side everyone really, really enjoyed my nipple clamps
Not only was there cake on the wall but someone shoved cake and meat in a cup and put it in the fridge.
Drinking gin at a party, riding a giant inflatable walrus all around the living room.
We dropped so many bottles they would only give us plastic cups. We actually drank ourselves back to preschool.
His dad gives me dirty looks whenever I come over though. I think it's because I eat his food and have sex with his son.
One day i'll wow you with artfully trimmed pubes.
Happy Halloween!! Last Halloween we spent together you got brought home in a shopping cart
Like what? And no, shrooms cannot be party favors.
Buying drug test kits off amazon. And qualifying for amazonSmile donation to a kids hospital feels wrong and funny at the same time xD
I cant believe you bit her ass cheek, she must have been really weirded out.
yeah so we made out to make it less awkward
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