I am 90% sure the kid in front of me in class is picking his face spots, smelling it, and then eating it. That is a LOT of % sure for something like that.
i paused nhl 10 while i jerked off and it was like a crowd was cheering me on
just dropped my bong into 7 pieces, and carried the glass shards around my house. dad saw the blood dripping down my arms, and asked if i slit my wrists. way too high to laugh at this.
If we were unicorns we would fly together. Like in a pack. A pack of flying unicorns.
I cant talk about it right now or let you guess, but its something you and i would do. Kinda like that time we had the case of beer and went bowling
You hooked up with minors in a golf cart?
She kept chasing him yelling thief, because he drank some of her drink. That was at 8, it got worse.
I'm glad we're going to catch up. too bad it's over my vagina.
I heard him say "bet you won't", look over 10 seconds later and she's blowing him.....looked eloquent under the glow of a camp fire.
It was a group decision to take your pants off. Took a solid 10 minutes. No more skinny jeans while drinking.
fuck it. from now on whatever room i wake up in, i'm stealing clothes from. this walk of shame shit is too much without pants
Your cousin just directly asked you for nudes
Alternately I could tell him western classical is just a series of events that had to happen for music to reach the point where Beyoncé was able to pen drunk in love, which is the pinnacle of humanity's artistic achievement thus far
thanks for supporting my whoreish tendencies
sorry about your sharpie. alex wanted to shave the left side of his body so he had me draw a line over him with a ruler
It was a crazy night: tears were shed, blood was spewed, and bottles were emptied.
Randomize
