Hey its my first time.
I think you mean "it's my first time"
i just woke up and "where the fuck is taco bell" was in my search engine...
some girl that im facebook friends with has H1N1, im scared to even go to her facebook page
im keeping my plan b box as a souvenir of my first halloween weekend in college
heey were did you guys go? last time i remember seeing you i was throwing up in the fountain
I really hope you aren't where I think you are. Dude she has a MUSTACHE. You need Jesus..
just tried to puke while my RA was trying to puke in the stall next to me.bonded for life
All I remember is doing a naked tuck and roll of your bed.
guy in front of me at the pharmacy just asked the pharmacist for 2 Plan B's and replied with, "If your wondering, then yes I did have a threesome. It was amazing".
And by "hammer out the details" you know I mean spending 20 minutes on wedding plans then getting wine drunk, right?
So the keyword here is "hammered"?
I don't know when it is this year, but if I ever text you an illegible text that also happens to contain sharks, Shark Week started.
Our DD has become famous. Strippers are asking to be handcuffed to him.
I'm wandering around outside asking things if they are god
we had a "who's sex playlist is better?" fight.....
Grandma and I are gonna see the new Tarzan movie, because we both appreciate shirtless Swedish men
Randomize
