see... this is why i put birth control in all my friends drinks
wait.... you do what?
They threw me out of the bar because I was arguing business ethics with the owner of th bar
I thought I walked in on an orgy of smurfs. Man I love shrooms
you told that cab driver that when the 3 of us come togehter it means happiness and love
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I couldn't figure out her damn button fly jeans... IM NOT A FUCKING ENGINEER
You wanted to thank my penis. You wanted me to take the condom off so you could touch it and thank it.
Do not tell me that that is not the face of a man who has sex with goats.
I want to be stormed in. I want to be stuck there. I want to climb a pyramid of strippers to safety
One of my life goals was never to see an uncircumcised dick. I guess that's out the window now.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I have really important information for you regarding the furry convention this weekend
I took a 19 year old to a strip club and ended up in a three way. Divorced life might be OK.
why do i have a pole dance champion shot glass?
Just got thrown out of the club for making condom water balloons. I'm not ashamed.
I'm not saying I'm planning to hook up tomorrow but I'm also not saying I'm unprepared for it
Can’t. It’s taco and dick night.
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