everytime i listen to a chris brown song and like it i feel like i bad person
His facebook profile says he's interested in men, but i'm choosing to ignore that
Did u pay ur friends to not make fun of me?
She has an incinerator in her basement. Have you ever incinerated used condoms?
Lmao what?
It's a yes or no question.
the three of them together have enough kids to fill a barney live audience.
Apparently it's ok to apply for building permits drunk. I feel like there definitely is a law preventing that.
You almost hooked up with 200lb woman in her mid-forties, because you were convinced she was adele. Your drinking problem is officially out of control.
I offered to buy ihop waffles for all the homeless people outside the metro. It was time to go to bed.
When a man can't even pay attention to you when you're telling him about how big his penis is, there's something wrong
Idk man, she was drunker than me and i was sitting there talking to a raccoon about it's broken leg.
Fucking someone because they own a lava lamp is like fucking someone because they have 20 dollars and no concern for their house burning down.
We just had a 30 min argument on the actual birth date of Jesus, it ended in my brother and ain't cursing each other and an 8 yr old answering it by using Siri.
I have weed and a speedo - I don't need anything else.
By chance and just chance did you find a cock ring? By chance
2020 sucks, I want a refund
Randomize
