I wanna dance tonight. i just wanna grind my ass in some man's dick.
Got home. Hugged Mom. The look on her face indicated she noticed nipple rings.
My friend and I just coined a new term. OBJ. The obligatory blow job. You totally know what I'm talking about.
Like if he goes down on you first, or you just don't want to bone him yet. OBJ.
I may have just serenaded the sadface couple sitting on a bench outside the dorm by singing Bye Bye Bye.
Well I pulled a muscle in my leg dancing in the tanning booth drunk at 1 pm soooo there's that
But you've got to admit , for how blackout I was I look fucking unreal in those pictures
If you come home soon there's a stripper in the shower. Don't be alarmed
Hello. You don't know me, but word on the street is that we are now eskimo sisters. I feel like we should go out for coffee and compare experiences.
Also I just sneezed literally 12 times in a row so violently...boogers everywhere. Sorry to ruin the sexting. I just felt like you had to know
I think the exact words were 'I'd lett him to the weirdest shit to me'
You gotta start bringing a flask to work so you can get a head start
Possibly a very genius or very terrible idea...
That's too much drama for once a month dick... that's in-house dick drama only
People are talking politics and I have had 9 mimosas
He left cushions on my floor, chocolate on my bra and unexplained scratches on my thighs. I think this one might get a second date.
the gnome is staring at me and the pineapple is wearing shorts. I don't want to do this anymore.
Randomize
