i just used a urinal to avoid climbing stairs, i need to quit drinking.
Pete just told the whole party I'm a squirter
I wonder if all of the nights I blacked out will be revealed to me when I die. Have you ever thought about that?
Want to come to my BBQ and Blow party?
dude I heard her through my door. She sounded like you were holding her head under water and they letting her up for air. I recorded that shit
Yeah someone just put a trash bag that says "use protection" on the snow penis
I was riding her and she yelled "fuck me" then someone in the room next door yelled "you don't have to say it if youre doing it."
In case you were wondering, taking me to see beauty and the beast in theaters would totally get you an unsolicited sloppy beej in the parking lot afterwards.
You should probably take note of that and make it happen.
She was the shot vending machine at the party. But free.
Can you come get Dustin he's putting taco bell fire sauce on cigarettes trying to light them again.
who started the 'put a scrunchy' around his balls' game?
They need to eat meat, go down on me the first time, every time, and know how to pull my hair. And there's a height requirement for this ride
I don't know what to do about my nipple.
Can't we just go back to fucking and having your boyfriend think you're completely straight?
sometimes u just gotta ride a dildo and forget about life
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