i guess its not very common for a paramedic to have to revive someone who was struck by a falling shampoo bottle while getting off from the bathtub faucet.
I called the bar to ask if they found my Id and credit card and they remembered me as 'the girl who signed her receipt in blood'
I just found all of my Mary-Kate and Ashley movies. Can you say drinking game?
Just watched my manager erase "we've been 2 days wo an accident" and change it to "0" these ppl are too high.
Was just practicing flip cup with my NyQuil cup...
I want to apologize but I don't know how. Do I just say "sorry for OD'ing on your couch"? I think that just sounds weird.
The nurse who basically saved my life just came into the store. Didn't recognize her. Awwwwkward.
Judge me...This apron fits PERFECTLY when I have no clothes on
Who said I was judging? More like congratulating.
Phone sex soon? I mean date. Sex date. Date phone.
all 3? possibly?
I think I'm up to the challenge.
I fell on my face, puked, and had to be rocked to sleep in a hammock. I'd say Europe is a success
Back. Waiting on Thong the shuttle bus driver. THONG
I faked more orgasms with him then ever should be allowed for someone this pretty.
My dream date: Hotdogs/nachos from the bar & tequila. Is that too much to ask?
Like what? And no, shrooms cannot be party favors.
It was a "have 911 on speed dial" kinda night
Randomize
